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More Seasonal Jokes

  • I planned a surprise birthday party for my wife. She found out three weeks early because I can't keep anything hidden, including my own excitement.
  • I hosted the neighborhood cookout this year. The hot dogs were fine, but my grilling confidence took a serious hit.
  • I tried making homemade ice cream for the Fourth of July. It came out somewhere between soup and disappointment.
  • I bought fireworks for New Year's Eve. Half of them didn't go off, which is roughly how most of my resolutions end up too.
  • I took the kids fishing for the first time. We caught two colds and zero fish.
  • I went trick-or-treating with the kids this year and ended up eating more of their candy than they did.

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