More Workplace Jokes
- I asked to reschedule the 8am meeting. They moved it to 7am to 'show commitment.'
- My performance goals this quarter include 'stretch objectives.' Mostly I'm stretching to reach the coffee machine before 9am.
- The company retreat included a trust fall exercise. I've never trusted my coworkers less.
- I asked my boss for a raise using data and evidence. He responded with a stress ball and a firm handshake.
- I asked for feedback on the new logo design. Someone said it 'reads well at scale,' which I've decided is a compliment.
- My office plant died from neglect within a week. I've named it a cautionary tale rather than throw it out.