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More Workplace Jokes

  • The IT department asked if I'd tried turning it off and on again. I had not, and it worked immediately, which is deeply humbling.
  • My manager said the deadline is 'soft.' I've since learned 'soft deadline' means 'still a deadline, but with extra guilt.'
  • The company survey asked for anonymous feedback. Somehow my manager still knew it was me.
  • The quarterly budget meeting ran ninety minutes over. Someone brought snacks halfway through, which was the only bright spot.
  • A new coworker asked me for career advice. I told her to guard her lunch, and that was the extent of my wisdom.
  • The all-hands meeting invite said '30 minutes, tops.' It ran an hour and covered exactly none of the promised topics.

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