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More Family Jokes

  • The cat's disdain for the new cat bed we bought is expressed entirely by sleeping exclusively in the box it came in.
  • The kids' 'I already asked mom' claim gets verified with a single text and revealed as fiction almost every time.
  • The kids' invented secret handshake has grown so complicated that even they occasionally forget the steps.
  • The kids' 'we're being safe' announcement usually precedes the exact opposite of safety by several seconds.
  • The kids' 'I'm the responsible one' claim gets tested and fails within roughly ten minutes of unsupervised time.
  • The kids' 'can we keep it' question about a stray animal has never once, in this house, resulted in a no.

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