More Family Jokes
- My kids asked why I hum while I do chores. I told them it's the only way I can afford therapy right now.
- I told my wife I was going to start eating healthier. She said the salad bar at the gas station doesn't count.
- My son wants to be just like me when he grows up. I haven't had the heart to talk him out of it yet.
- My daughter said my jokes were 'so bad they're good.' I've decided to only hear the second half of that sentence.
- I told my wife I could quit complaining any time I wanted. She said prove it, so now I'm complaining about that too.
- My kids asked if I was cool in high school. I told them I peaked at being tolerated, and I've held steady ever since.