More Family Jokes
- My kids caught me dancing badly in the kitchen. Now it's apparently a recurring bit they request by name.
- I told my wife I could hear the ocean in a seashell. She reminded me it was our microwave.
- My son asked if I was ticklish. I said no, then screamed like a smoke alarm for the next ten minutes proving otherwise.
- I told my wife I make all the big decisions in the household. She agreed, since she only handles the ones that actually matter.
- My daughter drew a family portrait for school. I was depicted as a small stick figure holding a giant coffee cup. Accurate.
- I asked my wife how her day was. She said fine, and I've been decoding that word for fifteen years now.