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More Family Jokes

  • My kids think I invented dad jokes. I've decided not to correct that assumption.
  • I told my wife I'd start going to the gym. That was my new year's resolution three years running.
  • I told my barber I wanted a shape-up. He said we'd need more than a haircut for that.
  • My daughter asked why grown-ups say 'we'll see' when they mean no. I told her it's the softest lie a parent knows.
  • I tried yoga for the first time. The instructor called it a 'gentle stretch.' My knees called it a betrayal.
  • My son asked how babies are made. I told him it's a long story and handed him back to his mother.

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