More Family Jokes
- The kids' 'I'll clean it later' has a documented success rate of approximately never.
- I bought a used trampoline off a classified ad. It came with zero instructions and one very specific bounce direction.
- The dog has three distinct barks: mailman, squirrel, and 'I heard a sound I didn't like.'
- The kids' idea of 'helping cook' mostly involves tasting everything before it's actually finished.
- The kids' 'we're bored' announcement always comes exactly ten minutes after I finally sit down.
- The kids negotiated screen time using a spreadsheet they built themselves, which was somehow more organized than my own finances.