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More Seasonal Jokes

  • I tried grilling for the first time this summer. The neighbors now associate the smell of smoke with my name specifically.
  • I decorated for Mother's Day and forgot my own mother was coming too. The flowers now serve double duty.
  • I told my kids we're going camping this weekend, no phones allowed. The silence that followed was its own kind of camping.
  • I filled the kids' Christmas stockings with fruit this year. Reviews were mixed, and by mixed I mean unanimous disappointment.
  • I set off on a family bike ride this spring. We made it four blocks before someone needed a snack break.
  • I bought a pool float shaped like a flamingo this summer. It has more social media presence than I do.

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