More Family Jokes
- The kids' 'I already said sorry' has never once, historically, resolved the actual underlying dispute.
- The kids' collaborative art project on the fridge has expanded to cover roughly the entire visible surface at this point.
- The kids' bedtime stalling includes a request for water that's really just a delay tactic in disguise.
- I bought a pressure washer on a whim. Now every surface in my life has been judged and found wanting.
- The cat's nightly zoomies happen at exactly the moment everyone's finally settled down to sleep, every single night.
- The kids' 'we're playing nicely' announcement is, statistically, the most reliable predictor of an imminent argument.