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More Family Jokes

  • My son asked why we recycle. I told him it's the closest thing to a superpower I've got, sorting cardboard from plastic.
  • I told my daughter I could juggle. Three oranges and one broken lamp later, I've retired from the circus arts permanently.
  • I bought a robot vacuum. It's the only member of the household that reliably finishes what it starts.
  • I told my son a bedtime story about my youth. He fell asleep before the interesting part, mostly because there wasn't one.
  • I told my son screen time was limited to one hour a day. He asked if that included the hour I spend watching the game.
  • I tried golf for the first time. Turns out I'm excellent at finding water hazards and terrible at everything else.

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